In the 5th grade I met the first love of my life, Michael. I was actually on time that day, and what made it even better was that if was the first time that had ever happened.
So as you can imagine, my teacher was shocked to see me lined up behind my classmates in the cafeteria that morning bright eyed and bushy tailed. I remember him coming towards me (probably to try and wave his hand through me to see if I was some kind of fake projection or hologram), when a boy walked up beside him. As soon as I knew it my teacher was saying, “Donyé this is Michael, Michael this is Donyé introduce yourselves!” with his big over the top grin. How did I react? Oh, by doing what any sane person would do.
I held his arm.
I held his arm.
It wasn’t just a brush on the shoulder, it was three whole awkward minutes of silent arm-holdage. I didn’t even let go until I noticed our class was leaving to go to the classroom, and boy let me tell you, I’ve never been so absent minded in my life.
But the party had just began!
Later that day I also managed to fight another girl for the last orange juice so Michael could enjoy his first breakfast at our school. I offered my used bandage to cover one of his papercuts that I gave him after taking papers from his hand a little too eager, and I even ran on the side of a bus hollaring and screaming
“GOODBYE MICHAEL!!! I HOPE YOU HAD A GREAT FIRST DAY SEE YOU IN SCHOOL TOMORROW!”
So yeah. That didn’t go too well. And my point is, I’m not very good at introductions…at all (as you can probably tell by my almost entirely unnecessary story). And I’ve been afraid of formally introducing myself ever since (My friends still talk about the bus incident to this very day)
to avoid me accidentally making a complete fool of myself in attempt to introduce myself, I’ll just settle for the classic Hi-my-name-is style. So,
Heylo, My name is Donyé